Lea Michele opened up on Thursday’s “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” aboutCory Monteith in her first TV interview since the “Glee” star’s shocking death in July.

The actress said it was incredibly difficult to grieve while in the public eye, sharing, “If you smile, it’s like, ‘She’s so happy.’ If you look sad, it’s like, ‘She’s terrible.’”

Michele told DeGeneres she chose to go back to filming “Glee” so soon after her boyfriend’s death because, “Going to work is no harder than being at home… and opening a closet and seeing a pair of shoes. Grief goes with you every day, whatever you doing.”

The star teared up while remembering her relationship with Monteith, saying, “I literally lived every day of my life feeling like the luckiest girl in the whole world. I just thought he was the greatest man.”

Later in the show, Michele performed her new single “Cannonball.”

Check out the videos below.